K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
Randomize
