wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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