Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Randomize
