I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
Randomize
