I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
i will never coherently bang her
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
