Pants 0. Shit 1.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
Randomize
