I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
Randomize
