dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
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