Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
