I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
Randomize
