Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
The good news is that I can 100% reassure you that you did not get knocked up by some creepy Italian dude named Sal Manella last night.
The bad news is that you will never know the name of the guy who may have gotten you pregnant last night because he clearly gave you a fake name, sweetie.
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
True strength comes from lack of pants
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
