chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize
