She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Randomize
