my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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