I wanna bring you to show and tell
I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Randomize
