I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
Randomize