when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
Randomize
