Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize