how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
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