what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
