I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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