This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
Randomize
