I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
Randomize
