somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
it's great music for shaving your balls
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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