More tranny stories later!
Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
This is classic penis vs brain.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
Randomize
