I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
