talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Randomize
