lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
Randomize
