thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
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