he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
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