We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
