he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize