just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
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