I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
