You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
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