apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Randomize
