he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
I took your shirt off for you after you threw up on yourself, read you the ugly duckling, and then tucked you in. you better fucking love me, jackass.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
Randomize
