he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
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