Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Randomize