i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Randomize