Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
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