but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
Randomize
