is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
3 2 1 whiskey
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
