it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
My dick has a subreddit
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Randomize
