She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
True strength comes from lack of pants
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
Randomize
