suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
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