oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
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