I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Randomize
