Capitaan dildo arrescate!
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
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