We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
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