I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
