Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize
