After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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