I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
I forgot wine drunk hurts
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
